Stuff For Sale
DDC-073 "HEAVY DUTY" Torso Cover
Product Description:I’m not gonna try to be tough here. I’m gonna play this one straight. Not the place for my usual bullshit.
It’s not easy being big. Clothes don’t fit. Plane seats take on a horrific quality. Health concerns haunt. Exclusions. Exceptions. Scoffs. Fuck all that shit. And if that’s not enough, there’s the beating up yerself in yer head. Insipid shit.
And if we can do anything for our fellow bigger brothers out there, it’s offer a quality shirt in their size. With special attention paid to sizing, completely cutting off all you twinkletoes in that all-too-distant “S-XL” sizing category. Sorry, this one ain’t for you. You’ve got it easy. Shit, last time I was in there was like 7th grade for this motherfucker. Moons ago.
And fuck, these shirts are TEMPORARY. Let them be a reminder to do what you gotta do to change shit up. It’s time to move. Do it with me. Less time on the ass. Less tube. Less working. More time outside. Take a walk. Take the stairs at work. Ride a bike. Wrestle the neighbor. Take a break from work and walk in one direction for 1,000 steps. I don’t know. Whatever the hell it takes to get us moving.
So just know, as a fellow “man of size,” I’m right there with you guys. And if I was ever to drop some of this poundage, know this: I’ll always be big in my head.
And to the next waiter, cop or jock that calls me “Big Guy,” I just might knock out yer fucking teeth.
Product Details:01. Thick ink on durable fibers.
02. Heavy duty vibes for heavy duty times.
03. Black, red and orange. Unfuckwithable colors.
04. He ain’t heavy…he’s my brother.
05. In the spirit of D. Boon, Pig Champion, Chris Farley, John Candy, big Jack Black, Bill Stevenson, Porkchop Holder, the big guy from the Pleasure Fuckers, Leslie West, Baby Huey, William Howard Taft, The Conner Brothers and our favorite beast of brawn, fuckin’ Tad Doyle.
06. Available in sizes: 2X, 2XT, 3X, 3XT, 4XT
07. So much real estate here.
08. Printed right here in by our buddy NIc, with understanding.
09. For our bigger brothers out there.
Ordering Details:$24.00 - Shipping Included (U.S.A.)
The Fine Print:For customers using PayPal, click the link above they’ll take it from there. For customers who aren’t using PayPal, send us an email to “orders(at)draplin.com” and we’ll get back to you with an address to ship the funds to. We accept money orders and cold hard cash, so, get with it, man! All orders are shipped out as fast as we can. Usually a couple days after the order comes in. We ship everything USPS “First Class” rates. If you want quicker shipping, contact us and we can ramp it up to USPS Priority, or whatever you need. We aim to please!
International Orders:We cover the shipping in the states, but charge the basics for international orders. Before you place the order through our PayPal account, send us an email to “orders(at)draplin.com” and we’ll get you a shipping quote for the goods you are interested in. As simple as that! Thanks!
©2012 DDC Dry Goods Div., Merch Dept., Portland, Ore.