MUSTARD IN A TUBE? PUT UP YER DUKES: I like my mustard “as yellow as possible.” RIght around a good PMS 108 or PMS 109.

I don’t fuck around with mustard…

01. Out of a fucking tube.
02. With bits of seed/bark/gravel/whatever in it.
03. That are jellied in any form.
04. Mixed with fucking honey. You dicks.
05. That looks like baby shit.
06. Of the “slathered on some fuckwad egg roll” variety.
07. That comes on some pretentious little spoon.

Just getting shit straight, people. Now you know where we stand.

It’s French’s or it’s dry.