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Draplin Design Co., North America
April 15, 2003
Preparation W
Posted at 03:33 PM

Headin’ toward Wyoming tomorrow night.

Big S if fired up. He’s ready to go. The tires, electrical systems, oil level and a list of miscellaneous fluids have been checked and are up to code. Still have a list of concentrated objectives to complete before pushing off into the wide-open eastern lands.

DDC ROADTRIP SHORTLIST:

1. CASH: Gotta get to the bank and get a fat stack of twenties. Fuck ATM machines when traveling. Motherfucker’s gotta be ready for anything; be it peelin’ off a couple for some lot lizard’s soft touch or payin’ off the fuzz after gettin’ loose on the speedometer. We run hot, which means one has to have ample loot in his back pocket to keep the tank full and everything cool.

2. TUNES: We’ve got a Gravis shoebox full of our latest rotations, as well as a well-stocked IPOD with a lifetime’s worth of road tunes.

3. EQUIPMENT: Various Leatherman products, one drool-stained pillow, one mangy, tattered blanket, waterproof matches, one lighter, some tnt, couple of flares, brass knuckles, a short band radio, one sketchbook, one cellphone, one scheister “roaming” cellular plan, one faux-birch cellphone cover, full spare in the back, one well-charged digi-Elph, Rand McNally roadmap (expanded version) of the continental states, couple of fishin’ lures, two piss bottles, one 10gb Ipod and of course, the DDC factory floor Ibook 14 incher in case something needs to get digital.

4. BACK HOME: Gotta lock down the apartment…close the shades, secure the prized valuables (gold, titles, certificates, deeds, etc.) and make sure all the proper appliances are turned off/unplugged.

5. NOTIFICATION OF LOVED ONES: Call the parents so they know the planned trajectory and promise mom we’ll call her nightly. VERY CRUCIAL.

- - - -

1040 UPDATE: Got the forms sent off and are gigantically pleased to say, “2002 was a very good year for the Draplindustries Design Co.” We finished the fiscal year comfortably “out of the red” and even managed to squeek a healthy refund out of Uncle Sam. We did it fair-n-square, with the help of a team of thorough, salt-of-the-earth accountants. Real official. Real good. Giant weight off the collective backs of the DDC factory floor.

There Are 6 Comments

Godspeed, you fuck’n lovebird.

Where’s my CDs?

Posted by: Ryno Wellwisher on 04/15/03 at 3:36 PM

Sounds wonderful. Nothing like a good list of “the needful” for a trip, it’s wise to have a plan and travel smart. You’re all set. A lot lizard’s soft touch. Wow. Speaking of which, I did some documenting of the Roadhawk truck stop while I was home (with you in mind); brief photo essay to appear on my site soon. I know this’ll be a great trip, I hope you share some photos.

Posted by: HammerTime Ch'mile on 04/15/03 at 4:38 PM

I’m so glad that I am not the only one who pisses in bottles on car trips.

Posted by: Kurt "No Need To Stop" Halsey on 04/15/03 at 9:00 PM

Damn, I wish I wasn’t a lurker. Oh well.

Posted by: WhiteBear on 04/15/03 at 10:45 PM

Oh yeah, don’t get a flat. It’s a bitch. By the way, nice work Mr. Draplin. It’s refreshing.

Posted by: WhiteBear on 04/15/03 at 10:50 PM

Kurt, I heard you piss in a juice box. (Just slip in in through the hole in the top.

OOOOoooooooooooooooooohhhh…

Posted by: Ryno, the Boulder Hurler on 04/16/03 at 10:56 AM